The Balto Bunny Project

There are a lot of things they don’t tell you about depression & anxiety. The absolute biggest one is that there is a reason for it! There are reasons why you are depressed, and the good news is that you can figure out what it is and fix it. Heal. Live a life that is free from depression. It involves digging a little and doing some detective work. It involves effort and commitment. It involved pain and struggle. It is not as simple as taking a pill, but the life you will end up living is the only one worth living. In order to perpetuate this billion-dollar industry, the medical profession would have you believe that the root of the problem is a chemical inbalance and you need to be medicated. They might even whisper about therapy and/or taking vitamins, but the focus is meds, meds and more meds. They further their point with family history. Maybe your mother was depressed. Maybe her parents… etc. They will tell you it could be a genetic problem. Every time the doctors told me this, I ignored another deep voice from within that said something is not right about this. The problem is that the meds only attempt to mask the symptoms, they do not repair or heal anything.

I have come to look at this from a completely different perspective. A perspective that inspires hope and gives the person suffering some of the control, that we are taught from the moment we walk into the first doctor’s office, that we do not have. (We are given the impression that this affliction has fallen upon us with no explanation as to why and no guarantee of when or if it will end.) Suppose I grew up with a mother who was depressed. From the time we first open our eyes we are learning from our parents, observing their reactions and how they process things. Sometimes we can identify things that they do that are blatantly not ways we want to be, but a lot of this data slips in under the radar and shapes our views and reactions to everything in the world. I believe that depression and anxiety is a learned behavior, and THAT in turn, alters our brain’s chemistry. By shedding light on this within ourselves, we can let it go and change. We can change our brain’s chemistry by changing our experiences. We can change the outcome of our lives by changing how we deal with things internally. No, it is not as easy as popping a pill. But it actually works and it is a permanent solution that will allow you to have a life that you never dreamed possible for yourself. Amazing things begin to happen when you begin to explore your depression with the right professional. It will begin to make sense. And that is the first step in healing. Without addressing the issue(s) that caused the depression and/or anxiety, we are doomed to a life of trying to mask the effects these experiences have had on us, but we never really make any progress. Hence, the statement I heard time and time again representing the views of the medical profession: “medication is about lifting the symptoms enough to be able to cope with depression.” Cope, meaning live with it everyday. No thank you.

Another thing they do not tell you is that the medicine does not know where it is supposed to go (your brain) and it affects your whole body, suppressing many important functions. For example one ‘harmless’ little side effect is constipation. Constipation is much more of a problem than discomfort. It is a symptom of the body’s inability to properly digest food, absorb nutrients and water, and rid itself of toxins. When your body is unable to rid itself of toxins, over time they build up which leads to a whole host of new problems: fatigue, weight gain, acne, more depression and anxiety, just to name a few. Of course, the solution to all of this is more medication.

The other thing they fail to mention (in addition to the fact that often medications stop working over time, and that you may live in complete hell going on and off various ones all with their own set of side effects) is that depression, if the underlying causes are not treated, only gets worse with time. At the time I decided to pursue my new path, it had become such a force in my life that there was little else. It was my lifestyle. It was my identity. It was me. Almost 3 years later, I am still discovering little subtle ways inwhich it has woven its way into every aspect of my life.

“Depression does not remain the same. It is in a slow state of flux. It may start off as mild sadness and feeling overwhelmed or hopeless, but as the years wear on, if the underlying causes are not treated, it evolves into a whole new playing field. It consumes you, becomes you, and at that point it is no longer just an illness, it slowly becomes a lifestyle and an identity. Once you are deeply rooted in this lifestyle, it is very difficult to get back to being yourself. But I am here to tell you it is possible, and the rewards are unbelievable.”